Alpha 31

The Supreme Swag Saga of the Batman Flavored Gatorade

$%45454543@#%$56$6,5123%346 nanoseconds later, Derek arrived at the planet FGretreijtioretrgFGERtretirjeotrgffjsgr, where he had received reports of a massive number of Man Eating Rocks that were trying to take over the planet’s entire supply of air conditioning units. Derek landed on the planet, but was ambushed by the 9gag Army and their allies the Racist Radical Republicans. They fired massive numbers of Tyler Follo Approved Spaz Robots at Derek’s location, but they all missed because they couldn’t agree on Derek’s location and ended up shooting each other instead. With that problem conveniently resolved, Derek moved toward the MER headquarters of Shisssssssssssssssdhoudh, better known as Betteer. Standing in his way was the Big Grey Cube, who unleashed the Chocolate Rain. However, the chocolate was A TRAP, and everyone who ate it became an Ottoman Empire Zombie. Then they all ganged up on Derek, but Derek destroyed them all with an laser fired by The Gun. However, ½ of one survived, and it threw a rock at Derek’s face. However, it got ran over, so the rock ceased to exist? WTF how does this make any sense? I mean, this stuff it weird but still, come on man. Alright, whatever, I’ll keep reading. With all of the useless distractions out of the way, Derek finally arrived at the Man Eating Rocks headquarters. However, he realized that all the rocks had vacated the facility due to their fear of Derek’s insane dive bombing skills. Derek was so mad that he fired a missile, but even when he was mad and not focused he was extremely swag, so the missile flew 5x100 yards and hit Tyler Follo square in the chest hairs.

Next Story