Alpha 6

Part of a Nutritious Not-A-Diet Diet

1 trillion billion million thousand nanoseconds later, Spencer ate all the celery. After that, Steven ate all the carrots. After that, OK this is getting boring. -0.00000000000000002 minutes after everyone ate everything, Tyler Follo drove his Suzuki to the planet Lions, home to 94% of Monkeys in the Multiverse. He brought with him 3.4574853287 metric tons of hippie bananas, which had the power to turn regular monkeys into rocket-launching cyborg monkeys. It also made them high on hippie bananas and gave them the power to send out massive supernova-like farts at will, with no deadly side-effects! Convinced that he could now have a decent Spaz Army for the first time in ∞ millenniums, he led the monkeys towards the Access Death Star and the newly-built PowerPoint Death Star. Ever since The Meta put the FrontPage Death Star out of commission 1,234 decimeters ago, Tyler was convinced by destroying the ADS he could eliminate all the Microsoft Office Program Death Stars. However, with PPDS now constructed, he knew he needed the incredible power of the Large Rocket-Launching Monkeys that were High on Hippie Bananas to defeat the combined might of both Microsoft Office Program Death Stars. Then, there was a fight. The LR-LMtwHoHBs wanted a pay increase, but Tyler wouldn’t give it to them, so they went on strike. 3 seconds later, they went grabbed all the driveways from the planet Ffnewufreyfureuobgfrehlgueygfreugfey7frgaeo8reg4rgfuhyrbfuyhbdh, and started pelting Tyler with driveways. Seeing this as an opportunity, Derek ordered the PPDS to fire its new Suzuki-Powered Red Spray-Paint Cannon of Extreme Jabba the Hutt Deaths, since everyone knew that red spray-paint was Tyler’s one weakness. Just then, Davis appeared and said he knew the LR-LMtwHoHB’s one weakness: YELLOW SEMI-TRANSLUCENT PLASTIC BAGS!!! Then, to prove his point, he loaded 3x10^12,000 plastic bags into his Suzuki Reno and drove over to the planet Lions, where Tyler was still being pelted by driveways. He then dropped all the plastic bags over the LR-LMtwHoHBs, and they all died a French Fry Jabba the Hutt Death. Then the PPDS fired a massive amount of red spray-paint at Tyler Follo, ELIMINATING him. Then it was The End because it was The End and that meant it was The End.

Next Story